Sunday, June 15, 2014

Right now isn't forever...

So. I have to be perfectly honest. It's the only way to stay sane now a'days. 

My life isn't going how I was hoping it would. I had this idea during my last semester of college that I was going to graduate, get my dream job right away, meet a special someone (or the thing with the guy I was "dating" would have gone better), I would be getting ready to move out, and things would just being going up for me.


I am still working at a retail, hardware store as a cashier.

I haven't found my dream job, let alone anything that would be considered a career.

I have been turned down for a lot of jobs actually. Not enough experience.
I am so ridiculously single. 

Like not even a slight inkling of anything in the thought of romance. (I still haven't heard anything from that guy that I was dating that went back to Canada. I unfriended him on Facebook. I was angry.)

I am not close to moving out on my own. (I am ridiculously poor.)

I am not in fantastic shape. (I may have stopped the 30 day challenges I was doing because of that bug bite put me out for a few days and then I just didn't start back up... Oops.)

Now I have been kind of down about the fact that my life isn't going in the super fantastical, movie like life. I have written about it a few times on here I think, which make me look like a total downer and makes me feel kind of like a total loser.

I have been doing a lot of deep thinking recently. About what I want in life. What I should do next. And dealing with my feelings of not being where I had planned and dreamed.

While I was doing all of this thinking, I came across a saying. It goes something along the lines of, "If God says no, it is because He has an even better yes waiting for you down the road."

A lot of people think that such a saying is something that should be considered cheesy or just wishful thinking. I don't find that to be the case.

I have come to the realization that I do know what I want in life. I do know where I want to end up. I know the direction that I am going. It is just going to take some time to get there. I have to be patient and wait for my "yes." I find hope in that saying.

There is hope that there is someone watching over me and knows what is best for me. There is hope that there is something right for me that will take me to what I desire. There is hope that there is something better yet to come. There is hope in the idea that even when life isn't going your way and knocks you down and around, if you are willing to get up and walk forward in life, you will come to your "yes." 

There is nothing wrong with having hope for the future.

That is my plan for my future: hope. I know what I want. I know where I am heading. I just have to keep moving forward. I just have to keep trying. I just have to have hope. My "yes" is there. For all I know it could be tomorrow. But I will never know if I give up because I keep hearing "no."

Yes my life isn't where I want it to be right now, but right now isn't forever. 

Til next time.


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