Dedicated to my life...

I just turned 18...like a month ago. During that month I've gotten a full ride scholarship for college in the fall (YAY no student loans!), thought my identity was stolen, frantically talked to at least 10 different bank people, found out my identity is not stolen but that I have no credit, gotten a credit card, found a place to get an auto loan, looked for a car,looked for a better paying job to pay for car and loan, and started preparing for final tests and graduation. Time is moving faster and everything is getting more complicated and I've only just gotten a taste of what its like being all grown up... I'm technically an adult....but I still feel like a child.

I don't always feel quite ready to handle all of the responsibility that being an adult requires. When you are an adult, you can't call "time out" to catch your breath...it never stops...its 100% all the time...go go go!!!....it is something to be reasonably concerned about.

I've always known this was going to happen...in the future. But the future is kinda now, and all of it is really starting to hit me....its kinda like standing in a field watching a plane plummeting toward the earth and thinking "its far enough away I've got time"...and then...it lands right on your head with fire and bangs and lots and lots of smoke. Well...that's a little dramatic but I'm sure you get the picture.

I guess I'm just worried that I won't live up to the expectations....no one wants to fail at their life...I want to be all successful and have everyone look at me and go "wow...she's got it all together!"....that's the dream...But I find myself thinking "What if I don't make it?"....being an adult is a lot to deal with...

But...there is still hope...

There is a lot about being an "adult" that scares the bejeezies out of me and I don't always feel ready for all of it and I worry that it will all squish me like a bug....I know that there is a lot to look forward to....stuff that isn't scary...stuff that is quite enjoyable. Like having my own car, making more money, getting smarter, starting a successful career, creating new and amazing relationships through college and work, and finding out more about myself......

And if all else fails...my momma will be there for me....with cookies and grilled cheese... :)


This is blog is dedicated to my life and me...

Pretending to Grow Up!